Category Archives: News

Monday Night Pub Quizzes In Edinburgh: Leith and Abbeyhill

Quizzes in Edinburgh Tonight:

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot: £100. Cheat: Captain And Tennille (music round)

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £90. Cheat news: Seal (pic round)

The song in the Brass Monkey Leith music round is by Captain & Tennille who were a big deal in the seventies.

For a while in the 1990s I was right into their schmaltz, I collected their albums.

Now in the modern era I can watch them perform on youtube, live and direct from the actual 1970s.

In true 70s TV superstar style, they always looked a bit wasted. I don’t really know what Quaaludes are but I bet they were on Quaaludes. These are drugs that always get mentioned in 70s rock life-fail biography paragraphs.

They were a couple and were married for 39 years and then she left him. He had some disease along the lines of Parkinson’s. She felt the marriage was a sham and only really there to please the fans.

I read so many of these stories when researching questions. Sometimes I feel sad for the participants and other times I feel nothing. I feel sorry for Tennille and the Captain. Maybe it’s because I like their hits. Perhaps I’m that shallow.

 

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Winning Feels Good

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Sunday Night Pub Quiz

Tonight’s quizzes :

6pm – The Persevere. Jackpot: £90. Cheat: Sebastian Vettel (pic round)

8pm – Tolbooth Tavern. Jackpot: £30. Cheat: Marina And The Diamonds (music round)

Last week it was LIGHT IN THE SKY on my way to the quiz. Just a little, but it definitely wasn’t full-on night-time any more. January is over. There is hope.

That’s a tune  from tonight’s music round. It’s not as good as her best hit, but of course that’s just my opinion. All the comments on youtube reckon that

  1. a) its the greatest song ever
  2. b )the bloke in the video is hot

Speaking of which, if you like hot guys, don’t miss the quiz at the Persevere tonight, where Leith’s greatest male talent lines up at the West end of the bar every single Sunday under the guise of their team name Blue Fox Tuesday:

Blue Fox Tuesday – driving the ladies daft for four years straight.

 

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Thursday BIG QUIZ MONEY in the Edinburgh you love to call Home

Quizzes Tonight:

7pm – Argyle Bar (Cellar). Jackpot £150. Cheat answer: Scissor Sisters (pic round)

9pm – The Newsroom. Jackpot £100. Cheat answer: Selena Gomez (music round)

Selena Gomez isn’t on Cunt Cards, but her ex-boyf Justin Bieber is. Why? Cos he’s a mad wee cunt. What are Cunt Cards? Well… they’re coming soon. All should be revealed before the end of the month. Meanwhile, you can track them on World’s Worst Cuntos

Meanwhile, here’s the SG tune from tonight’s music round at the Newsy:

The video is a little depressing. It’s a hundred years since women got the vote and I haven’t looked but I would be amazed if Selena Gomez hasn’t espoused girl power and female empowerment at some point.

Despite this, Gomez’s video is your totally standard pop-star-in-her-pants number.

The porn is partially disguised. There is also a bloke with a chest. The story has a small twist which leads the critics to write things.

Carley of Spin magazine called it “a sexy psycho-thriller” and viewed its Apple Music exclusive release as “a smart pop play”. Sean Fitz-Gerald of New York magazine deemed it “very cinematic, twisty”, likening it to the 2015 film The Gift.

No. It’s just pop porn.

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday Is The End Of the World

Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £90. Cheat: Pulp (music round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £30 Cheat: Mister Messy (pic round)

The Rnd of The World looms like a ghost wolf. Will you survive? Will The Queen survive? In a lifeboat, last gasp, gunnel-threatening situation: who would you cast off first: The Queen or Prince Harry?

Imagine their royal glubs as the sea enveloped their future, brought death to their faces and finally, as it became clear that their time was all but gone, made them the same status level as other humans.

Meanwhile, away from the burning hatred of royalty-as-a-concept, Pulp provide one of the moments in the Joker music round tonight. Good song.

Pulp are always a favourite but I’ve been listening to the Fall this week.

It was on the way home from Wednesday quizzes last week that I found out old bawjaws had carked it.

Turned out me and my pal David were at the last ever Fall gig at the QM in Glasgow.

Here’s Mark E Smith’s final stage entrance, and it’s a better view than we got…

All the quizzes for the rest of the year are dedicated to the memory of Mark E Smith.

My favourite Fall record isn’t even by the Fall, it’s by Mike Reid:

Mike Reid Sings The Fall
Mike Reid Sings The Fall

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Monday Pub Quiz Edinburgh

Quizzes in Edinburgh Tonight:

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot: £50. Cheat: Ellie Goulding (music round)

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £60. Cheat news: Nigeria (pic round)

The song in the Brass Monkey Leith music round is by the Ellie goulding. Here is the:

God, it’s so straight.

Here’s something I found earlier today which is NOT STRAIGHT: some bloke from Turkey messing about with frets. He could just leave them alone and play the guitar, but it’s not his style. Microtonal, that’s the name for this weirdness.

This has got nowt to do with the quiz by the way, I just thought it appropriate to provide at least one ever so slightly different way of looking at the world after the sledgehammer normality of that Ellie Goulding tune. I felt my brain turning to ceramic while listneing to it.

Don’t let the same thing happen to you.

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For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Sunday Night Pub Quiz Action In The Burger

Tonight’s quizzes :

6pm – The Persevere. Jackpot: £60. Cheat: Qantas (pic round)

8pm – Tolbooth Tavern. Jackpot: £30. Cheat: Snow Patrol (music round)

Here’s a cheat-preview of one of the songs in the Tolbooth Music Round tonight:

 

In truth, this is the kind of music that makes me want to physically attack people, such is the misery, the beige and the lack of anything. Don’t listen to the tune. Don’t click the video unless you really really need to hear the tune to secure those two points in tonight’s quiz. It’s terrible.

It’s like the worst parts of Radiohead, Coldplay and Elbow all squeezed into a single three-minute poo.

Are there people cluttering up your front room who you hate? Play them some Snow Patrol. Although maybe not. Because if they’re cunts anyway then they might stay if you play Snow Patrol because they’re a cunt’s band. And also, if you did play Snow Patrol just to get the cunts to leave your front room, then you’d have to listen to Snow Patrol too.

Easier just to ask them to leave.

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Thursday Night Pub Quiz Action in Edinburgh

Tonight:

7pm – Argyle Bar (Cellar). Jackpot £90. Cheat answer: Chicago (pic round)

9pm – The Newsroom. Jackpot £100. Cheat answer: Janet Jackson (pic round)

The music round cheat answer is by Janet Jackson. Her brother is dead but you don’t care… he was just a pop star.

They’re all just pop stars and they all go. Even the bloke out of The Fall.

Mind you, I liked The Fall and it might just improve your life ever so slightly (if you’ve never heard of them) if I were to share one of two of their works.

You could well hate them, but you never know…

1. Kicker Conspiracy

(Flair is punished)

2. Eat Yourself Fitter

(Like many of their songs, I have no real idea what’s going on in the song – just like it)

3. Lost In Music

Disco cover. This one has a cunt talking for the first 45 secs. Best to fast forward

4. Edinburgh Man

Local tour:

 

 

 

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday Night Pub Quiz Action

Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £60. Cheat: Happy Feet (pic round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £30 Cheat: East 17 (music round)

Wednesday poos all over the faces of the other days. It’s like day of the week- PLUS. It’s better than Saturday, and that’s saying tsomething. Wednesday is always excellent.

If Wednesday were a biscuit it would be dark chocolate digestives. If Wednesday were a pop band it would be Queen/E.L.O./Human League supergroup. If Wednesday were stained glass, it would be stained glass penis. If Wednesday were a Christmas, it would be Christmas 1985

Did you know about the time Brian Harvey out of East 17 ate too many baked potatoes and , as a result, ended up running himself over with his own Mercedes? It sounds hilarious but the true story is hardcore. He says it WASN’T a suicide attempt.

Anyway, their limp-as-old-celery cover of an already-limp Pet Shop Boys song is in the music round at the monkey tonight. Be prepared!

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Monday Night Pub Quiz Edinburgh Action

Quizzes in Edinburgh Tonight:

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot: £100. Cheat: Tomb Raider (pic round)

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £30. Cheat news: The Cramps (pic round)

The song in the Safari music round is by the Cramps. There are a lot fo bands in the world but only the Cramps are the Cramps. Here is the tune:

The Cramps would turn up for anyone. Jools Holland on The Tube? Aye, why not. They also played state mental hospitals if you asked them:

I’m pretty sure I’ll end up doing quizzes in places like this. It’s the final destination.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.