Category Archives: Joker & The Thief

Wednesday 5th Dec – Quizzes Tonight In Edinburgh

Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £30. Cheat: OMD (music round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £60 Cheat: Myanmar (pic round)

It’s midweek in December, the month that’s dominated by Christmas. All I’m saying about Christmas is don’t miss out on Cunto Cards – the only gift that’s guaranteed to raise a laugh this year

Cunto Cards
Cunto Cards. Utterly hilarious. Twelve pounds.

Anyway, Cunto is just the sideline. The main business here is pub quiz and tonight we have NICE QUIZ for you.

Here’s the tune that’s my free answer for the music round at the Joker tonight. It’s eighties Scousers, OMD:

I always thought the singer out of OMD looked like John Collins who used to play for Hibs and Celtic.

Whaddya reckon?

I hope you like that. It took over ten minutes.

Anyway, come to the quiz and we’ll all live happily ever after.

Yo,

Dr P

Remember to follow Dr Paul Twitter for massive thrills and fact action and Instagram for visual hits.

bad quiz answers at the Dr Paul quiz
One they missed: Tapioca

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday Night Quiz In Edinburgh

We had enormous jackpot wins last Wednesday, so it’s all back to normal tonight. Will anyone turn out? We’ll see later.

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot: £30. Cheat: One of the answers in the picture round is Bulgaria

9pm – Brass Monkey (Drummond Street). Jackpot: £30. Cheat: One of the music round hits is by Nu Generation. See video below to hear the song.

The song is a remake of an old sixties number by Fontella Bass. I only just found out that Fontella Bass is a woman, rather than the name of a band which I always thought it was.

Every day… Learning like as student.

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Wednesday Quiz Info

7pm The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot: £90. Cheat: Music round contains Midge Ure (see vid)

9pm The Brass Monkey. Jackpot £30. Cheat: Pic round includes Turkish Delight

I remember 1985 when the Midge Ure video came out and everyone was freaking out about the pin-screen thing.

I’m pretty sure they did a feature about it on Blue Peter.

The pin thing was a like a revolution of entertainment.

It was as if life would never be the same again now the pin thing had arrived. Life was going to be different.

The craze lasted roughly seventeen minutes and by 1986 your pin-screen was the most passe thing of all time. You were already a retard if you still had one, despite being the coolest kid in school a matter of week earlier.

Now you can get em in the poundy and if I’m in there getting shit prizes for the quiz and I spot one, I still always think of Midge Ure.

Such was the power of this video.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Quizzes Tonight in Magnificent Edinburgh

Vote for me, cunts!

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot: £90. Cheat: the picture round includes an iguana.

9pm – The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street). Jackpot: £30. Cheat: the music round includes The London Boys, both of whom are, sadly, dead. (See video below)

Pure dance quality by the way. 89-style.

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday Edinburgh Pub Quiz Info

Two quizzes on the Dr Paul circuit tonight. Key info:

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm. Jackpot £30, cheat : Cristina Aguilera is in the picture round.

The Brass Monkey, Drummond Street, 9pm. Jackpot £210. Cheat: Jellybean is in the music round (see vid below)

Jellybean‘s real name was John Benitez and the 80s he brought club house sounds into the charts in the guise of pop. The tunes still stand up. Billboard magazine have rated him as the 99th greatest dance artist of all time.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

If You’re Going To Be A Twat, Get It Right

Look, I don’t mind people being verbal twats right in my face.

Whether such twats are wrong or (occasionally) right, I can handle that. It’s fine. I enjoy the interactivity.

But I dinnae like snakey wee jizzers who sneak their fraudulent biros onto my posters, especially when they are totally wrong.

false spelling claim
That IS how you spell ‘believe’, dipshit.

So if this was you, then you are at liberty to go and fuck yourself. Go fuck yourself right into a dictionary.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Trash Talk Sound Like They Kind Of Mean It.

Here is the informational run-down for tonight’s Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh City

The Joker And The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: Stands at a rambunctious £90. That’s nice.

Cheat: One of the answers tonight is Spain (its in the picture round)

The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: Is also an awe-inspiring £90. If you had that all to yourself what would you do?

Cheat: One of the answers in the music round tonight is Trash Talk. The song is called Uncivil Disobedience and it only has five thousand views on youtube:

I don’t know if Trash Talk mean every bar of it or whether they are kids who are ttrying too hard. Either way, it’s a groovy way-out sound and I’m sure they’ll go places in the hit parade.

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Nigel Farage in a Garage

I had a drawing contest on Wednesday at The Joker & The Thief.

The challenge was to draw Nigel Farage in a Garage. There are at least four different ways of pronouncing that sentence.

Anyway: Here are six of the best:

1. Infographic

This one goes for reductive simplicity:

drawing contest nigel farage in a garage (2)

2. Pipe Swap

Farage has a pipe up his pipe. Wisely, he is not smoking in this one.

 

drawing contest nigel farage in a garage (3)###2. Massive Dog

3. Massive Dog

 

This one renders the UKIP mastermind as a very massive creature that looks a bit like a dog. I like this one and I can’t think why.drawing contest nigel farage in a garage (4)

4. Think of The Children

Nigel Farage has a solution for orphaned emigrants/travellers/refugees/migrants/incomers (etc). Put them in a garage and make them watch kinky stuff.drawing contest nigel farage in a garage (5)

 

5. Plain Evil

The malevolence of Nigel’s racism shines through in this catchy number:drawing contest nigel farage in a garage (6)

6. The Winner

And the winner was this one which has got just enough sex-stuff in it but not too much.

a_scan_315

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday 27th April

It’s snowing. So come to the pub and watch your troubles melt away under the glacier-reverse policy of BOOZE.

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: £30

Cheat: One of the answers in the quiz tonight is West Side Story

Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: £90

Cheat: One of the music round moments tonight is Kurtis Blow doing ‘The Breaks’ – see video below:

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday 20th April 2016

Quizzes tonight have that midweek smell of booze and success. Who knows. Maybe I’ll stay out tonight at the Monkey and DJ hot hits until I get slung out at one in the morning with the other drunks…

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: £60

Cheat: One of the picture round answers is “The Smiths“. Brigid will get that one, easy.

The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: £60

Cheat one of the music round bits is a band called Alphabeat. See video below. Decent for a modern pop thing. Probably because it’s very 80s. The youtube comments say “90s” but I reckon its more 80s. Anyway it came out in 2010 and I’ve just read that they are Danish which explains a lot.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.