Category Archives: Dr Paul’s Blog

Tonight’s Edinburgh Pub Quizzes With Your Old Pal Dr Paul

I am a friend to you. I can help you. I can solve all of your problems. I am THE DOC. Come to my quizzes tonight.

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot: £50. Cheat: P.I.L. are in the music round – see vid below.

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £120. Cheat: One of the answers for the pic round is Liberal Democrats

P.I.L. was John Lydon’s vehicle after he had finished being Johnny Rotten out of the Sex Pistols.

I only knew the singles, never got an album and I remember thinking at the time that I was never very sure if I liked the songs or not.

I still feel that way. I get his voice. But he never topped the Pistols. Pistols were ace.

By the way, anyone can win that lovely cash that lurks at the end of every Dr Paul quiz. Last week at the Brass Leith £50 in single-crispy form went the way of Andy. Look how happy it made him:

Andy is so happy
Andy is so happy


For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Sunday Sunshine

I’m writing this in advance so I don’t know if there is sunshine or pissing rain. Mind you, even if I was writing it on Sunday morning, the same would apply to this evening.


6pm – The Persevere. Jackpot: £60. Cheat: the music round includes the Donnas. See vid below to hear the song.

8pm – Tolbooth Tavern. Jackpot: £180. Cheat: the picture round includes the answer Led Zeppelin


The Donnas aren’t as good as L7, but who is?

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Thursday Bangers

Couple of rollovers at the quiz last Thursday so tonight offers you £300 for your purse:

7pm – Argyle Bar. Jackpot £150. Cheat: The picture round includes Lady Jane Grey.

9pm – The Newsroom. Jackpot: £150. The music round includes Robin S – see vid below.

Oh god. That sound is so great. It’s so 1993.

The hefty pop bass. Oooft.

The doodly-doodly-bit. Sweet.

The big soul vocal. So real.

So nineteen ninety three.

Of course, 1993 is when I was 21, and so automatically the greatest year of all time.

Doc gettin OLD!

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Wednesday. Literally Millions of Pounds In Quiz Jackpots Tonight

Not literally literally. That’d be stupid.

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £210. Cheat: Music round includes Tinchy Stryder. See vid below.

9pm – Brass Monkey (Drummond Street). Jackpot £180. Cheat: Pic round includes tragic hero Mister Man character Mister Nosey.

So, although not actual millions, tonight could win you £390 which is enough to fly to any part of Europe and back and still get tremendously drunk once your there. Maybe even accommodation although if you pick a 24-hour city like Berlin, there’s no need.

Meanwhile, Tinchy Stryder, what’s that all about? Well, I can report that I got 42 seconds into his song before having to stop it cos it is shite.

Not that my opinion will matter to thon TInch. A quick Google for ‘Tinchy Stryder Net Worth’ brings up $4 million dollars, which is enough to fly to Berlin and get wasted every day for a year. With (good) accommodation.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Fuck Mindfulness. Come To The Quiz

Mindfulness doesn’t work. Quiz does.

Le proof? Here’s some people winning £200 last Monday:

Spare A Quiz For The Bus Win £200
Spare A Quiz For The Bus Win £200

Tonight’s quizzes:

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot £50. Cheat: One of the picture round answers is Saint Mirren.

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £90. Cheat: One of the music round bits is by Alyssa Reid. See vid below:

I’m listening to the song just now as I type.

And I’m thinking ‘Why the hell did I put this in the music round? It is awful‘.

Perhaps I was thinking it would relate to the younger quizzers (it came out in 2011 which feels like three minutes ago in my rapidly aging world) and perhaps I was thinking it would simultaneously strike a chord with older quizzers (the far better original came out in the 80s).

Jesus it’s awful.

It’s got autotune, it’s got the weepy-crying voice beloved of modern singers, and a completely inconsequential rapper doing a totally meaningless rap break.

Nae need.

It’s the sort of music you like if you’re into real estate. It’s the kind of music they like in New Zealand. It’s probably on the a thousand Spotify playlists put together by people who have never been on a European city break, preferring instead to tan their bodies and flush their minds. I can be this much of a snob.

The experience of listening to the song compares unfavourably with doing the four times table over and over and over again. And I hate the four times table. Three, I’m fine with that. Five, nae bother but the four times tables sucks balls.

The song has stopped now, and so has my hatred. See you tonight.


For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

The Sex And Race of Lou Reed

Bad answers last night at the Argyle.

Teams were asked to identify this bloke in the picture round:

Clues were added that we were talking about a US rock star, famous both in a group and as a solo artist, someone who died in 2013 at the age of 71.

This was enough clues for a couple of teams to come up with the answers:

  1. Little Richard (who is black)
  2. Billie Holliday (who is black)(and female)

This is despite Lou Reed (above) being a a fairly obvious white male.

Oh well.


For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Poetry Found

This was discovr’d left over on the back of someone’s picture round at the Leith Monkey last week…

It reads thus:

If I could, I'd cut off your finger,

To remember the past.

Whenever I am thinking of you,

I'd stick it up my arse.

I'm telling you this just to say,

I hope you have a lovely Valentine's Day...


Genius. And it look’s like Ally’s handwriting. But I can’t be sure.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Sunday Dreams

Pub quizzes in Edinburgh tonight:

6pm Persevere. Jackpot £60 cash. Cheat: Eric Clapton is in the music round (see vid below).

8pm Tolbooth Tavern. Jackpot £120 cash. Cheat: One of the pic round answers is a Hillman Imp

I can’t be bothered with Eric Clapton or ‘Derek Caption’ as is his real name.

The music strikes me as dull. And he doesn’t even dress up for his gigs. He looks like he’s about to solder some kind of circuit.

To be fair. ‘I Shot The Sherriff‘ is all right but he never looks as though he enjoys anything.

Can you imagine him getting wasted on red wine and strong weed and playing Risk all night? Nah, me neither. And that’s how I judge people.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Voucher Report

First in an occasional series of reports detailing what the winning team did with their booze voucher.

LOCATION: The Argyle Bar

DATE: Last Thursday

TEAM; Omni



2 x Tennents

3 x Bunnahabhain

1 x Black Sambuca

1 x Tequila


Nice work. I know nowt about whisky but apparently Bunnahabhain is a good one. The Sambuca and the Tequila add urban street edge while it’s all backed up with a pair of basic pints, the kind of pints that built Scotland into the international superpower that she is today.

Well played, Team Omni


For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Sunday Night Pub Quiz

Hey. Come to the quiz. It’s great fun with your mates and you can win money.

6pm – The Persevere. Jackpot: £60. Cheat:  the picture round includes a Harpy

8pm – Tolbooth Tavern. Jackpot £60. Cheat: the music round contains your old pal Shakin Stevens. See video below to hear the song:

Shaky was big in the 1980s. I remember him always being on Top of The Pops. My mum bought the ‘Shaky’ album, just like everyone else in Britain did in 1981.

But the 21st century is an unforgiving landscape for 80s legends, particularly the youtube comments section.

A person named ‘TurfGuy’ comments:

Shaking Who? This limey faggot has no talent. Elvis had more in his feces than this needle-dicked motherfucker

This seems a bit much. And, of course, TurfGuy is wrong. Shakin Stevens isn’t a Limey. He isn’t English, he’s Welsh.

Also, I don’t know many albums TurfGuy has released that have gone Gold or Platinum. Shakin Stevens has five.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.