Category Archives: The Brass Monkey

Joker & The Thief, News, The Brass Monkey

Wednesday 10th July 2019

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Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £30. Cheat: Madagascar (pic round)

9pm – Damm 27. Jackpot £40. Cheat: Billy Ocean (music round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £30 Cheat: Rocky IV (music round)

Cheat tips: First of all, here is the Billy Ocean which features at Damm 27 (9pm):

San Francisco? Yeah mate. Been there in ’78. For the riots.

Billy Ocean has been confirmed by professional scientific geographers as being the deepest, the biggest and the best ocean in the world. In this song he sings about the Caribbean Sea, which is wayyyy smaller than him.

Too cool.

The other music round cheat clip for tonight refers to the quiz at the Brass Monkey. It’s a film music round so tonight you have to name the film. This is one of the songs, which comes from Rocky IV:

This entrance was recently riffed by Tyson Fury before his Las Vegas fight with Tom Schwarz, which was cool. Also, Fury’s bout had a happier ending.

My own entrance music tonight will be somrthing less epic. I’ve been listening to a lot of Italo Disco this week so it might be something like that. You love it.

I don’t know if Shawn uses entrance music at Damm 27 but if he does it will be cool, cos Shawn’s cool. Maybe it’s Die Antwoord cos he’s South African and I just imagine that south African people listen to nothing but Die Antwoord all day.

Come on!

Remember, country’s about to be exploded to death by whatever Tory wank gets into number 10, so you might as well go out now while you can…

… before… The Purge.

Oh yeah.

Dead Pool July 2019
Dead Pool July 2019

Love,

Dr P

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News, The Brass Monkey, Wednesday

Quizzes Tonight – Wednesday Night In Edinburgh

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Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £30. Cheat: Glaxo Smith Klein (pic round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £30 Cheat: Slade (music round)

Big jackpot at the Monkey last week means minimum amount tonight.

Still loads of great fun to be had and I have now taken delivery of Cunto Cards so you can buy a pack off me tonight, directly.

Meanwhile, here is one of the music round pieces from the Monkey tonight. It’s from one of my favourite bands, Slade.

When I was a kid and first into pop music at the start of the 1980s, Slade were yesterday’s men, comedy characters from the dim and distant mid-nineteen-seventies.

You knew their songs, they’re ‘oldies’ were always on the radio. And you knew they were wacky: the bloke with the mirrors on his top hat and the gurn. The daft looking-cunt on guitar. Song titles with funny spelling. For instance: Skweeze Me Pleeze Me. A ha ha ha. So hilarious.

You knew them primarily for ‘Merry Christmas Everyone’ which was virtually the British national anthem at that time. Literally everyone’s favourite song. No exceptions.

Then, just as they were in danger of becoming a ‘national treasure’ they bucked their own legacy and had a string of 1980s hits which were slightly less energetic than the 70s numbers but still had plenty of powerful pop quality.

This is one of them.

Come out and win tonight. Go on. Come and have feel.

Yo!

Dr P

 

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Dr Paul's Blog, The Brass Monkey

Who Knew That “Cock Or Ball?” Was Even A Thing?

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Until two Wednesdays ago, I had no idea that ‘cock-or-ball’ was even a thing.

cock or ball
Cock or Ball? Myles style.

How it works:

  1. Turn away from the gathering, for a little privacy,
  2. Fetch a piece of your ballsack OR cock and introduce a portion of it forwards through your fly.
  3. Ensure that there is a great enough portion to be seen, but a small enough portion not to be obvious.
  4. Turn to face the gathering, present your portion, and challenge them thus: “Cock or Ball?” (see above for an example by Myles from the Brass Monkey.
  5. The assembly make their guesses.
  6. You reveal the answer (not necessarily the proof)

I have no doubt that at some point in the future, this will make it to Channel 5.

Did you get the right answer? It was Myles’s…

…

…

…cock.

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News, The Brass Monkey

Beat The Clock – Get To The Quiz

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You can always join the quiz late. No problem. But it works better if you are on time. Tonight’s events:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot: £120. Cheat: The picture round includes Juan Manuel Fangio

9pm – The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street). Jackpot: £60. Cheat: the music round includes Sparks. The song is in the video below. Sparks are great. Lots of invention, sass, oomph and choonage – the four classic elements of pop.

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Joker & The Thief, News, The Brass Monkey

Quizzes Tonight in Magnificent Edinburgh

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Vote for me, cunts!

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot: £90. Cheat: the picture round includes an iguana.

9pm – The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street). Jackpot: £30. Cheat: the music round includes The London Boys, both of whom are, sadly, dead. (See video below)

Pure dance quality by the way. 89-style.

 

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Joker & The Thief, News, The Brass Monkey

Trash Talk Sound Like They Kind Of Mean It.

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Here is the informational run-down for tonight’s Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh City

The Joker And The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: Stands at a rambunctious £90. That’s nice.

Cheat: One of the answers tonight is Spain (its in the picture round)

The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: Is also an awe-inspiring £90. If you had that all to yourself what would you do?

Cheat: One of the answers in the music round tonight is Trash Talk. The song is called Uncivil Disobedience and it only has five thousand views on youtube:

I don’t know if Trash Talk mean every bar of it or whether they are kids who are ttrying too hard. Either way, it’s a groovy way-out sound and I’m sure they’ll go places in the hit parade.

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Joker & The Thief, The Brass Monkey

Wednesday 27th April

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It’s snowing. So come to the pub and watch your troubles melt away under the glacier-reverse policy of BOOZE.

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: £30

Cheat: One of the answers in the quiz tonight is West Side Story

Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: £90

Cheat: One of the music round moments tonight is Kurtis Blow doing ‘The Breaks’ – see video below:

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Joker & The Thief, The Brass Monkey

Wednesday 20th April 2016

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Quizzes tonight have that midweek smell of booze and success. Who knows. Maybe I’ll stay out tonight at the Monkey and DJ hot hits until I get slung out at one in the morning with the other drunks…

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: £60

Cheat: One of the picture round answers is “The Smiths“. Brigid will get that one, easy.

The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: £60

Cheat one of the music round bits is a band called Alphabeat. See video below. Decent for a modern pop thing. Probably because it’s very 80s. The youtube comments say “90s” but I reckon its more 80s. Anyway it came out in 2010 and I’ve just read that they are Danish which explains a lot.

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Joker & The Thief, News, The Brass Monkey

Wednesday April 13th

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Quizzes tonight are just for fun. The jackpots are so basic that there will be almost guaranteed JUST FUN. No violence. No arguments. Just happiness.

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot cash: just the £30

Cheat: One of the music round answers in the Village People (see video below)

Brass Monkey (Drummond street), 9pm

Jackpot cash: cheeky little £30

Cheat: One of the answers tonight is “Pandora”

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.

Joker & The Thief, The Brass Monkey

Wednesday 6th April

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It’s a new financial year. Celebrate by winning money and putting in a fucking ISA or something.*

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: £60

Cheat info: One of the answers in the picture round is Cleveland, Ohio.

Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Big jackpot tonight: £180

Cheat info: one of the songs in the music round is an old punky pop classic by Bow Wow Wow (see vid):

 

For cheats and hints to win Dr Paul quizzes in Edinburgh, get the weekly email.