Category Archives: Dr Paul’s Blog

Dr Paul's Blog, News

Wed 9th Jan 2019 – Wednesday Quizzes

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Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £30. Cheat: England (pic round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £180 Cheat: Senor Coconut (music round)

Note the large jackpot at the Brass.

Yeah – The first Joker & The Thief quiz of the year finally marks a return to full normality. Let’s enjoy the straightness, the orthodoxy and the sheer normality all the way up to the Festival. First half of the year is the best half of the year.

And, in football, it’s an odd year so there’s not even a European Championships or World Cup this year to wreck everything in June/July… no… NO.. WAIT – The Women’s World Cup is on this summer in France and Scotland have qualified.

It’s the first time a Scotland team have qualified for the World Cup since 1998 which is pretty much since you lot have been born.

But it is women’s football, so will the occasion be marginalized, ignored and swept under the carpet?

Or will the paucity of Scottish football success manifest itself in a big fuss and a big buzz for the women’s team?

I have no idea which way this will go. I suspect the former and kinda hope for the latter. Me and the missus and the kid were even thinking of going over to France for one of the games. Quite fancy Scotland v Japan in Rennes – 14th June.

Anyway, sidetracked. Here is tonight’s music round cheat clue which is for the Brass Monkey:

This is one of Senor Coconut’s terrific techno-merengue-style covers of the songs of Kraftwerk.

Now, Kraftwerk has always been great but just sometimes you listen and think “this is all a bit exact, a bit teutonic – it needs some loose Latin“. And, happily, Senor Coconut fills this need.

I was reading about him the other day. His real name is Uwe Schmidt and he’s a German bloke who was so into Latin techno that he moved to Chile. The video was filmed in Santiago, Chile and is worth a watch.

Disappointingly. the fat bloke with the maracas who stars in the video is not the actual Senor Coconut. But you can’t have everything.

Anyway, come to the quiz and we’ll all have a good time.

Yo,

Dr P

Remember to follow Dr Paul Twitter for fact thrills and  and Instagram for pictorials.

Image result for postcard of dundee

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Dr Paul's Blog, News

Mon 10th December – Quizzes Tonight In Edinburgh

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Quizzes in Edinburgh Tonight:

7pm – Brass Monkey Leith. Jackpot:£50. Cheat: Twickenham (pic round)

9pm – Safari Lounge. Jackpot £60. Cheat news: Katy B (music round)

Monday smells and it smells like victory.

Come to the quiz.

Now, here’s the reward for reading this post:  a free answer for tonight’s music round at the Safari Lounge.

I haven’t listened more than once or twice but I think there’s not much lyrical content: I think it’s about going out and getting wasted.

Music in it is excellent though, even though it is “very modern” in my book.

Not that modern, however, it you iz youtz.

The youtube comments are full of young people saying things like  “whooooooooaaaa – I can’t believe this is five years old”. and “I feel so old” and “music isn’t like this anymore”.

Fuck off kids, I’m old enough to remember Mike Read banning ‘Relax’ while simultaneously giving Bruno Brookes a rather hypocritical reach-around and calling Matt Bianco wankers, live on Swap Shop.

That’s real nostalgia.

Image result for king penguin

This #penguinmonday might be the last. Look at the scabby state of this one.

Yo,

Dr P

Still reading? Follow me on stupid TWITTER, people, or even check the nice Instagram

No More

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Dr Paul's Blog, News

Quizzes Tonight – Thu 22 Nov

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Quizzes Tonight:

7pm – Argyle Bar (Cellar). Jackpot £30. Cheat answer: Syd Barrett (music round)

9pm – The Newsroom. Jackpot £50. Cheat answer: Grace Kelly (pic round).

So who is Syd Barrett? you might ask, having just read the music cheat clue for the Argyle Bar.

Syd Barrett was a scout troop leader from Cambridge who went on to be the original front man and guitarist for Pink Floyd before he went mental in 1968 and got kicked out of the band for being useless to the Pink Floyd world-domination project.

After leaving the Floyd, Barrett did a couple of solo albums and they are bonkers/brilliant. The one that’s in the Argyle music round tonight is one of my favourites:

After Syd Barrett, the Floyd became a lot more serious and continued to be so, forever. Ho hum.

POLITICS THURSDAY

By the way- Thursday is now the day when I express my opinion on the crazy world of politics

This week’s point: INDEPENDENCE? I DON’T REALLY CARE ANY MORE.

I voted YES in 2014 but I’m not so sure now.

Thing is, whether we are UK or Scotland or EU, the same rules apply: the rules of market capitalism.

Where you draw the line on the map matters less than how you set up the rules of the game.

If the rules allow individuals and corporations to become immensely rich, the you can draw the border wherever you like and it will make no difference.

As long as you allow one person to own more than one house, then you have landlordism and a continuing rich/poor division.

Scottish independence offers a new line on the map but no new line on property rights and no new vision on the bigger questions.

So right now, I ain’t buying it. I can’t be arsed with all that palaver again for the trivial goal of a line on a map.

Disagree? Come and argue with me at the quiz.

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Anyway – come to the quiz. I love you all.

Love,

Dr Paul

By the way: Dr Paul is on Twitter and Dr Paul also is on instagram. Enjoy.

doodle of a sad pig
A pig who is sad because we do not allow pigs at the quiz

 

 

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Dr Paul's Blog, News

Thursday Night Edinburgh Pub Quizzes – Thu 15th Nov, 2018

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Quizzes Tonight:

7pm – Argyle Bar (Cellar). Jackpot £30. Cheat answer: Macbeth (pic round)

9pm – The Newsroom. Jackpot £200. Cheat answer: PJ & Duncan (music round).

Anyone 35-45 reading that PJ & Duncan are in the music round may just have experienced a wave of hot nostalgia.

Innocent times when Dec was Duncan and Ant was PJ, in the auld days before PJ stood for “Pished on the Juice”.

Anyway, as Winston Churchill probably used to say “Nostalgia is for the weak. Bite me.”

Here’s the music round cheat for tonight which is for the music round at the Newsroom:

Awful isn’t it?

POLITICS THURSDAY

By the way- Thursday is now the day when I express my opinion on the crazy world of politics

This week’s point: RECYCLING IS RUBBISH and RICH PEOPLE NEED TO STOP LECTURING THE REST OF US ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT

Someone’s making money out of recycling and the world’s not getting fixed because even recycling still means making more stuff.

So, until X-boxes can be made out of lentils, the only true environmental fix is to stop consuming things.

But good luck trying to sell that idea to the filthy-minded public who, generally, just want to buy MORE STUFF and go MORE PLACES.

If some middle-class hippy is giving you shit about recycling, ask them if they’ve been on a plane this year.

In terms of carbon footprint: ONE passenger on a return flight to New York = total average UK household carbon footprint for three months.

So if you live with someone and you both go to New York for a long weekend, you’ll need to turn your house off for half a year when you get back if you want to “offset” the damage. Which you would never do.

And isn’t always the rich people barking on about what “we” must do to combat climate change?

Isn’t it always some Bono, Branson or Paltrow?

And how many flights do those chancers take per year?

And did you know that a toff travelling on first class flights creates a carbon footprint NINE times that of a passenger in economy.

They could turn ALL their houses off and they would never make up for it.

But we can stick our environment up our arse, can’t we? After all, they don’t want to sit in the same room as the plebs.

What a crew of utter wankers.

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Anyway – come to the quiz. I love you all.

Love,

Dr Paul

By the way: Dr Paul is on Twitter and Dr Paul also is on instagram. Enjoy.

 

 

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Dr Paul's Blog, Team Names

Team Names of The Week, 8th Nov 2018

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Actually, some of these are a bit older than the last week, but you get what you pay for…

Team names of the week
The Findus one is so nostalgic

Nice to see East Lothian people in the big city. I think they were fairly well behaved. Put it this way: they didn’t bring their pigs into the actual pub.

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Dr Paul's Blog

The Music That Vegans Listen To

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Last night at the Monkey I had a bonus round where you had to be the first team to write down ten singers or bands that Vegans probably have on their favourites playlist.

Here is the winning entry (the first team to hand in ten decent answers that anyone had actually heard of):

Vegan music
Vegan music

That last one is meant to be Joy Division even though it looks like Soy Division… which would work.

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Dr Paul's Blog, Wiki Of The Day

Wikipedia Sentence of The Day: Lennie Peters

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I love myself a bit of Peters and Lee, and I always knew Lennie Peters was blind but I never really thought about WHY he was blind until about two minutes ago when I read this on Wikipedia:

Lennie Peters…, an uncle of Rolling Stones drummer Charlie Watts, was blinded in one eye during a car accident when he was five years old. A thrown brick blinded his other eye when he was sixteen.

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Blimey AND Gordon Bennett

Link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peters_and_Lee

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Dr Paul's Blog

The Importance Of A Good Tie Break Answer

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Here’s some free advice from me, your old pal, Dr Paul.

Don’t go to the bother of getting all the answers right in the jackpot round and then write down that Moscow is 25,000 miles away from Edinburgh as a tiebreak answer.

Other examples exist but the distance questions come up fairly frequently.

The highest number this would ever be would be Edinburgh – Auckland (New Zealand) which would be about eleven thousand miles.

So there’s your rule of thumb.

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Dr Paul's Blog, News

Wednesday Is Just Another Word For Winning

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Quizzes tonight:

7pm – The Joker & The Thief. Jackpot £30. Cheat: Calum Scott (music round)

9pm – Brass Monkey, Drummond Street. Jackpot £30 Cheat: The Beatles (music round)

English: Wednesday

German: Mittwoch

Quiztalk: Day of Excellence and Winning

French: Mercredi

Greek: Tetárti

Great stuff eh? Ye cannae beat Wednesday in the same way that you cannot beat Brian Jacks at dips or squat-thrusts.

If you are under 40 you might have difficulty remembering what the hell squat thrusts are. Let me tell you, they were big business in the early 80s.

We were ALL doing squat thrusts.

Anyway: here’s the music clue for tonight’s quiz at the Joker & The Thief. It’s possibly the biggest load of shite of all time

The original was proper fantastic normal Europop but this turkey does his sad-business, spoils it and make a shitty video to go with it which is so heavy-handed it even washes everything out in blue because blue = sad.

This kind of over-obvious symbology along with what I call “the crying voice” are the reasons I cannae stand modern pop. Does my absolute nut in.

The worst bit is when you look at the youtube view count and you see a figure of nearly 300 million. All of those millions of people can’t be wrong… can they?

Maybe it’s me who is the wrong one. I guess we’ll find out before we die.

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Here’s the advertorial.

I sell my utterly hilarious Cunto Cards in case you didn’t know.

You can always buy a deck from me tonight at the quiz and they are also available online.

If you want to try before you buy, the Joker and The Thief AND Brass Monkey on Drummond Street both have packs behind the bar you can borrow.

You can also follow Cunto Twitter for daily anti-cunto action.

Yo!

Dr P

 

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Dr Paul's Blog

The Fresh Princess of Bel Air

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I did a bonus speed-round last night at the Newsroom where teams were asked to come up with ten artists (bands or singers) with names related to plants.

One of the answers handed in by Quizlamic State was “Willow Smith”.

So I ask, “Who’s this?”

Willow Smith 2011.jpg

Turns out she’s Will Smith’s daughter. More than a few teams seemed to know this.

This raises a few WTFs:

  1. WTF is Will Smith doing being old enough to have a daughter who is old enough to have her own music career?
  2. WTF is wrong with Will Smith: having a daughter and then calling her Will(ow). That’s a Dick Move, officially.
  3. WTF! – when I had a quick looky-uppy it seems that Willow Smith is not yet 18 and that she released her first pop record (‘Whip My Hair’) when she was NINE YEARS OLD. What mad hot-housing is this?

She looks like him doesn’t she? But then, that’s how it works.

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