So if the King is going to pop off then we’re going to need a replacement, assuming we haven’t left behind our national weighted diving suit of subservience.
However, as captured as our spirits are, I’m sure we can all agree that primogeniture is old hat.
So instead of simply defaulting to the next in line, let’s just appoint a good one.
Here’s a quick list of the four top candidates so far:
Les Dennis
Pros: Appeals to young and old alike. Harmless. Funny.
Cons: Can’t think of any
Jet out of (original) Gladiators
Pros: Super flaming red hot. Drives men nuts. Women too, it turns out.
Cons: Can’t think of any
Giant out of (new) Gladiators
Pros: Muscle-bound man-mountain and athlete. Would destroy other monarchs if a one-on-one is required.
Cons: Can’t think of any
Paul Coia
Pros: Good availability. Safe hands.
Cons: May not be famous any more. Possible decline of the royal brand
Who else could do a job? Let us know on the Facebook
Here are tonight’s real-life moments of pain and pleasure:
6.30 pm – Porty Tap (with Isla)
Jackpot – £90
Free answer – MUSIC round: “ZEDD“
Book: 0131 629 6266 or Facebook
8 pm – Waverley Bar (with Bonni)
Jackpot – £30
Free answer – PICTURE round: “CILLIAN MURPHY“
Book: 0131 557 9855 or Facebook
9 pm – Safari Lounge (with me)
Jackpot – £120
Free answer: PICTURE round: “SOFIA LOREN“
Book: 0131 661 4741 or Facebook
With quiz and love,
Dr Paul
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