The last weekend before Christmas is legendary for pished fools making work for the rest of us. Tonight, for example, is known by bar staff the world over as ‘BLACK FRIDAY’

But to be honest, the office party roasters who lit up the Newsroom last night weren’t that bad. I had the obligatory two drunk birds (one blonde, one brunette) who, every time I opened the mic to ask a question, screwed up their faces and screamed at me to shut up and “just play a fucking record”.

But their pals from ICAS (something to do with accountants) were mainly very nice. The Shetland folk in particular.

You know, even the obligatory two drunk birds (one blonde, one brunette) wereny that bad. They were just in party mood.

The rudest guy of the night meanwhile was, surprisingly, upstairs at The Cellar Monkey when I was handing out sheets.

You know who you are, arsehole.