It was Valentine’s Day last night (at both quizzes).
Valentine’s is always a weird night. There are couples who never go out with each other and have no idea what to do. They are awkward.
Some of the groups of single people are awkward. Awkwardness hangs in the air like Lynx Africa.
This was more true at the Newsroom, being a city centre venue. The Argyle was quieter as the romantic pairs were probably all in Salvatore’s instead. We’ll never know. It was certainly more relaxed and that’s why I went for the ROSES ARE RED contest there.
Simple instructions: write a four line poem where the first line is “Roses are red”.
Here are the results.
ACTUAL POETRY
Roses are red
Violets are too
I’m Colourblind
And fucking hate poetry.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I have a knife
Get in the van
Roses are red
Love is dead
Maddy McCann’s skin
Covers my shed.
Roses are red,
May is absurd.
They want to leave the EU,
But you can’t polish a turd.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Poetry is dead,
And so are U2.
Roses are red
My baws are blue.
My gooch is broken,
My sex life is too.
There you go. These works were all written in the space of a few minutes. See how easy it goes? You too can be a great artsit.
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