This month it took me a while to get round to fixing up Aril’s best efforts. Here they are in my humble, unworthy, shitty little opinion.

If yours’ isn’t there it’s because I’m thick as mince and missed your obvious genius. Fight me.

Nice to see the dark side of town (Corstorphine) getting a shout-out. I never do quizzes out there, mainly because I never want to go there.Going to Corstorphine is how I imagine death. I’m in no hurry to experience it.

Apart from the zoo.

Mind you, the older I get, the worse I feel about the internment of animals, so even the zoo is shit. Not to mention the price, and the fact they’ve thinned out the animals for ‘welfare’, meaning that there’s only about six different animals in there now.

When I was a kid the animals crammed onto that hillside cheek-by-jowel like raisins in a fruit cake. And they had EVERYTHING. Like Noah’s Ark. It was awesome. And it was about ONE POUND to get in.

And if you couldn’t be bothered even paying a pound, you could easily climb over the fence/gate at the top of Corstorphine Hill.

Not only did this make the zoo free, it also meant that your progress through the animals was all downhill instead of the usual hike upwards.

Totez amazeballz, as none of us ever used to say.