Squeak like a mouse. Do it for daddy.

Tonight’s quizzes:

The Joker & The Thief, 7pm

Jackpot: A healthy, happy £120. Can you win it? Yes you can.

Cheat: Tonight’s quiz includes the answer Sicily, which crops up in the picture round. Now you know.

The Brass Monkey (Drummond Street), 9pm

Jackpot: In amongst the heaving youth, there will be £120 ready for the plucking. Turn up with half a brain and you’re halfway there. Like Jon Bon Jovi.

Cheat: The music round includes this clanking of slice of shite by Howard Jones, from what is known as my “youth”:

Not cool? Well, it’s all we had in 1984. That and the Eurythmics. I could never work out whether the Eurythmics were cool or arse. Bit of both, I suppose.

Here is a picture of someone winning at the quiz, hopefully this will inspire you to be like them!